THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME

For those who ask why someone might get involved - and stay - in a violent relationship, the answer is both simple and complex at the same time.  Domestic and family violence rarely happens out of nowhere. It is the result of slow, steady acts of oppression and control. A violent relationship rarely starts the way it ends.

In the first episode of There’s No Place Like Home, we introduce you to Laura*. When Laura* became involved with her perpetrator, she was intoxicated by him. She describes the early stages of their relationship as “very teenage, 90s, romantic comedy”. He was thoughtful, Laura* says. Kind. He paid attention to Laura* in a way that her previous partners hadn’t.

But ever so slowly, over time, the nature and tenor of their love story changed… And Laura* moved into a women’s refuge, in fear of her life.

This episode explores violence as a complex web of activity. It looks beyond cuts and bruises to the psychological nature of Domestic and family violence. With the help of experts, advocates, practitioners - and of course Laura* herself - we’ll seek to answer the question: How does a relationship go from passion and presents, to knowing your very existence is under threat?

Listen to Laura's story here.

Read the transcript for episode one here.

Geraldine’s mum Anne didn’t like Ted* from the beginning. But Anne found it hard to put her finger on exactly what bothered her about him. That’s because Ted’s behaviour was a complex web of expectation, pressure and manipulation, more commonly referred to as coercive control.

Coercive control is a pattern of conduct employed by abusers. This is violence that happens slowly. It doesn’t come out of nothing. It is a gradual building of cruel, threatening and intimidating behaviours. Together these subtle acts combine to strip away the victim’s sense of self-worth, their loving relationships and their personal and financial freedoms.

Some Australian state governments are exploring ways to make coercive control a crime. But it’s tricky. How do you define violence that is so hard to prove? The impact of physical violence is so much easier to measure.

In this episode of There’s No Place Like Home we introduce you to Geraldine and unpack the debate on whether coercive control should be a crime. A question on which key groups in the women’s safety sector are divided. You’ll hear experts from both sides - with a particular focus on how this issue affects Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people.

With the help of experts, advocates, practitioners - and of course Geraldine herself - we’ll answer the question: Would criminalising coercive control even make a difference?

Listen to Geraldine’s story here.

Read the transcript for episode two here.

May* felt safer sleeping in her car, with a brand new baby girl, than she did in her home. With no money, no access to credit and no support service that would take her - the car was also her only option after escaping a violent relationship.

 Domestic and family violence is the main reason that women seek the support of homeless shelters and the primary cause of homelessness amongst kids. In Victoria, where May lives, there are nearly 50,000 people on public housing waiting lists. When someone leaves a violent relationship and needs somewhere to stay, they are faced with a sector that’s struggling to cope.

 In this episode of There’s No Place Like Home, you’ll hear May* describe her experience of leaving a violent relationship and ending up homeless. You’ll hear from experts who lament the lack of affordable housing.

Having a safe home is a human right. It’s also a real foundation of the social order our society is built on. The home is where we entertain our friends, and where we spend time with our families and rest, yes. But you also need a home address to apply for a car loan, or to pay your phone bill, or to enroll your children in school or register for a Medicare card.

Getting back on your feet once homeless, is much more difficult than you might imagine.

With the help of experts, advocates, practitioners - and of course May* herself - in this episode we implore our audience: Stop asking why doesn’t a victim doesn’t leave a violent relationship, and start asking ‘where would they go?”

Listen to May's* story here.

Read the transcript for episode three here.

Nina* never knew if Joe* was telling the truth. Joe said he used to be a police officer, and that he still had good mates who served on the force. Joe said he knew everything there was to know about the courts.

 Nina* still doesn’t know for sure if her former partner had the skills and expertise he boasted about. What she does know is that Joe used these pieces of information to scare her into submission and silence. To make Nina* think she was alone and powerless, and that Joe had the contacts to cover up whatever he did to her.

 In this episode of There’s No Place Like Home, you’re going to meet Nina* and hear about her experience of reporting domestic and family violence to the police. You’re also going to hear from experts about the new models, new approaches and new training being undertaken in some police jurisdictions, that are cause for genuine optimism about how these cases are handled.

The odds of an arrest being made, when someone does make a complaint to police, often turn on the presence of physical injuries. If a victim has suffered visible injuries, police are up to four times more likely to arrest the perpetrator than if no injuries are apparent. 

But what happens if a victim doesn’t have physical evidence of injury? What if they’ve been subject to financial, psychological or emotional abuse? What if their physical assault left no mark? What options are available to them?

Listen to Nina's* story here.

Read the transcript for episode four here.

Eleanor* once owned an apartment in the United States, had a significant share portfolio and a very healthy savings account. She is now living paycheck to paycheck. The costs of a legal battle with her abusive former partner total more than a quarter of a million dollars.

Eleanor* says her former partner has deliberately drawn out the court case in every way possible. It’s been three years since proceedings began. Beyond the financial burden, that’s three years spent trapped in the past, and being forced to recount the darkest time of her life as evidence.

We’ve passed the halfway mark in There’s No Place Like Home and in this episode we explore systems abuse. With Eleanor*’s help, Future Women does a deep dive into how perpetrators manipulate the very laws designed to protect victims.

Often, when a person leaves an abusive relationship, it doesn’t mark the end of that relationship’s story. Instead it is the beginning of a new chapter. One which can have a protracted and painful emotional and financial impact.

In this episode of There’s No Place Like Home, you’ll hear from experts, advocates and practitioners - as well as Eleanor* herself. Together we’ll explore some of the possible solutions including specialist domestic and family violence courts. The early research on which is very positive.

Listen to Eleanor*'s story here.

Read the transcript for episode six here.

Thanks to the advocacy and work of countless individuals, Australia is facing up to the scourge of domestic and family violence. However, the community and media attention has not been equally distributed.

Many survivors still feel like their experiences are invisible. Members of the queer community may also be victims of domestic and family violence and some say that indifference to their stories can compound trauma.

In this special episode of There’s No Place Like Home, we introduce you to Jex. Jex is a trans man, who presented as female when he first met his partner more than a decade ago.

Jex was subjected to physical violence as well as coercive control. But there weren’t the support services available to him that there would have been if Jex were a straight woman.

Systems are generally built to service the majority, with insufficient care for the minority. Those whose particular needs don’t fit into a neat little box, are often left languishing…

In this episode of There’s No Place Like Home, you’ll hear from experts, advocates and practitioners - as well as Jex himself. Together we’ll unpack how to make the queer community’s experience of domestic and family violence more visible and better supported.

Listen to Jex's story here.

Read the transcript for episode seven here.

In this episode of There’s No Place Like Home we introduce you to Carly. A proud Wiradjuri woman, Carly is the CEO and co-founder of Deadly Connections, a not-for-profit organisation that breaks the cycle of disadvantage and trauma for First Nations people through transformative justice.

In her work, Carly taps into wisdom borne of her own lived experience as a domestic and family violence survivor. And she does that work alongside the man who once perpetrated violence against her, Keenan Mundine.

Together, Carly and Keenan use their experience and expertise to help other First Nations people transform their lives for the better.

This is a particularly complex and nuanced episode of There’s No Place Like Home. In it, we explore a restorative justice framework and how it might offer a more responsive and fulfilling outcome for some. It’s about giving victim-survivors back their autonomy and power, when a court process might leave them feeling frustrated and out of control.

In this episode we’ve been led by Carly herself. She demonstrates both remarkable empathy and distance from her own situation. Carly thinks about the violence committed against her in the context of Keenan’s childhood and intergenerational trauma.

Listen to Carly's story here.

Read the transcript for episode eight here.

Amani was pregnant with her first baby, in 2015, when a cousin called her. Her cousin was panicking and through a jumble of mixed up sentences, told Amani to go to the hospital.

It was there that Amani learned her father had murdered her mother, Salwa. He had killed his wife of 28 years in a violent attack

Both Amani and her sister Nour, have joined us for this episode of There’s No Place Like Home. Today we ask ‘what’s next’ for survivors of partner violence - and also the loved ones who are left behind.

Amani is a remarkable woman. Not only has she been forced to comprehend her grief in a very public way, but she has been able to do so while creating some truly beautiful art.

In this episode and through her acclaimed creative work, Amani gives us the chance to go inside her world - inside her mother’s world - and better understand the complex realities of domestic and family violence.

Listen to Amani's story here

Read the transcript for episode nine here

There is an emotional journey that happens after abuse. It isn’t quick but rather long and winding. For a survivor of domestic and family violence, what does that thorny path to long-term recovery look like? How do you retrieve, revive and redefine your sense of self?

In the final episode of There’s No Place Like Home, you’re going to meet Deborah. Deborah is an incredible advocate, an author and a mum. Nineteen years ago, she and her three young daughters escaped her abusive husband with just $100 and the clothes they were wearing.

Today, Deborah has been out of her abusive relationship for a year longer than she was in it. She has a new life with a partner who is loving and kind. Her daughters have had counselling and are all grown up now. Deborah’s life is much bigger than the worst things that have happened to her.

In this episode of There’s No Place Like Home we ask what happens to victims of domestic and family violence who do survive. With the help of Deborah, as well as experts and advocates, we’ll learn what it takes to recover financially, physically and emotionally - and to reclaim one’s life.

Listen to Deborah's story here

Read the transcript for episode ten here